Matt's asking the big questions: If Jimmy Carter is truly a traitor, yet as an ex-president he still gets top-level intelligence briefings, is the Republic safe? I expect that George W. Bush is feeding him misinformation so Carter will mislead his superior (code name: Jesus), but how can we know the tricky devil isn't seeing right through it? Indeed, are we giving him access to confidential memos on CIA agents? If so, has he done anything to blow cover, like pose nude for homosexual websites or offer his services as a male prostitute? Has anyone looked into that Sunday school Carter has been teaching for decades? Maybe he's a pedophile!
These questions must be answered, and quickly. While the Democrats stonewall, Jimmy Carter plots and Americans slumber on, dangerously unaware of the 80-year old ex-president and his similarly aged wife massing on their border.
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(If there's one thing we know about comment trolls, it's that they're lazy)