Back in late 2000 and early 2001, I used to run a financial news parody site called DonkeyBusiness (think The Onion, but for the stock market). I let the domain registration lapse many years ago, and the site no longer exists. But it seems that bots cruising the internet to collect occupational data about people have recorded information about the fictional analysts and fund managers that I was quoting in my parodies. For example, if you want to see which stocks Albert Henderson of Lehman Brothers thought would go up if Pat Buchanan won the presidency, ZoomInfo has preserved his immortal advice along with that of several of his financial industry colleagues right here.
I've included one of my best pieces of work below the fold. It was written on the terrible day in November 2000 when the word 'butterfly ballot' entered the lexicon, and the NASDAQ continued its epic collapse. Being "short" a stock, by the way, is a way of betting it will go down by selling it when you don't own any yet:
