Later today, Tim Pawlenty will ascend to a stage wearing a bearskin tunic with a club perched on his shoulder, and tell the American people, "Ooog! Government bad! Ooog!"
Or just about, anyway. According to Politico, Pawlenty will lay out his economic plan, which includes cutting taxes on the corporations and the wealthy (surprise!), and a plan to slash government spending:
"We can start by applying what I call 'The Google Test.' If you can find a good or service on the Internet, then the federal government probably doesn't need to be doing it. The post office, the government printing office, Amtrak, Fannie and Freddie, were all built for a time in our country when the private sector did not adequately provide those products. That's no longer the case."
Well, that makes sense. If there is anyone out there providing a service that's kind of like something the government does, the government should stop doing it. So we'll just dismantle Medicare and Medicaid, and Tricare for veterans too, because there are private health insurers. Amtrak? Shut 'er down. Sure, there aren't actually private passenger train options, but you can take Greyhound. And the post office, of course. Yes, that means there will be no more mail service to rural areas (FedEx and UPS only deliver where it's profitable), and it will cost you $18 to mail in your electric bill, but don't you feel freer already?
What does this teach us? Fundamentalism makes you stupid. It's true of religious fundamentalism, and it's true of free-market fundamentalism. I'm sure if you started questioning Pawlenty on the specifics, there would be a hundred exceptions to his "Google Test." Well, yeah, he'd say, the fact that Blackwater exists doesn't mean we should shut down the U.S. military. And OK, I guess it's really not practical to close every public school in America, even though there are private schools. And I guess you're right that we shouldn't shut down food-safety inspections just because meat producers say they can police themselves. And speaking of police, I suppose the existence of private security companies doesn't mean we should fire every cop in America.
One would hope that all those exceptions might make Pawlenty say, "On second thought, this 'Google Test' is kind of idiotic. I guess what I really mean is that different government services operate in relation to the market in different ways, and although there are some things government has to do, and some things government does better than the private sector, there are many things that could be better done by the private sector. That's what I meant to say."
He won't say that, of course. "Ooog! Government bad! Ooog!" will get more applause among GOP primary voters. And Pawlenty is supposed to be one of the "serious" candidates. This is why we can't have nice things.
