Wearing a lilac sweater, crushed velvet pants and a star necklace, Asra Q. Nomani hardly looks like a revolutionary. But she's helped shake up a mosque in Morgantown, West Virginia, -- and, indirectly, mosques everywhere -- with her demands that women take on leadership roles and, at the very least, be allowed to sit near men during prayer services. For that (and for organizing a women-led Friday prayer in New York last month), she's received a death threat and been criticized by Muammar Quaddafi, who said the prayer service could inspire a terrorist attack and create “a million Osama bin Ladens.” Nomani, a former Wall Street Journal reporter, talks about hajj, foreign policy, and her friend Daniel Pearl, the Wall Street Journal reporter who was beheaded in Pakistan in January 2002.
How do you find the courage to do this stuff?
When I was on hajj, I committed myself to public service, and when I returned home to Morgantown, I signed up to be a volunteer at a domestic-violence clinic. I went for 20 hours of training and learned about the “Duluth model,” which is a power-control wheel created by domestic-violence experts in Duluth, Minnesota, that shows what a woman encounters when she confronts her abuser. These women face intimidation, isolation, and emotional abuse. I realized I was an agent for change and the harassment and the intimidation were a reflection of that. Quaddafi is just a man trying to protect his power and control. He is trying to ostracize and demonize those who fight against him.
You've gotten a death threat.
The e-mail said, “Death to Asra.” Am I scared? I don't feel the fear in my heart, but I'm practical. I tell the FBI everything. You know, it's a boundary that we usually don't cross as journalists. But I want to stay alive. I told the agent, “You have to do everything to protect my ability to speak.” These days, I'm best friends with the Morgantown police.
What kind of necklace are you wearing?
It's a star from Spain, sent by a State Department security guy. He wore a trench coat and dark glasses, and he helped Mariane [Pearl, Daniel's widow] and me in Karachi after Danny was kidnapped. He was our Rambo.
It's a sentimental gesture for a Rambo.
It shows the humanity of the struggle we're in. What we learned from our experience in Karachi is we really need to work together in order to clean the world up of bad guys. Shibli [Nomani's 2-year-old son] loves it because he knows how to say, “Star.” He chews it.
How did you get started on your book?
I wrote an “Outlook” piece [about women's rights in mosques] for The Washington Post in December 2003 and got more than 300 responses -- 90 percent positive. Since then, we've begun discussing women's issues in the public space as a priority in our community.
How do you battle against extremism?
Most Muslims want to live peacefully with others. We just have to open our mosques so people don't have to fear walking in the door. The Methodist church in my hometown has a sign that says, “Open doors, open hearts, open minds” on the door. Our mosque has a sign that says, “Hidden camera. Surveillance camera present.” The windows have literally been blocked by bookcases. It's daunting. We can't expect compassion if we don't practice it ourselves. And we can't expect open doors in this world if we don't open our doors.
Why do I bother with my mosque in Morgantown? Because it's my home turf. I'm a Muslim, so I have to stand up within my Muslim community, and possibly one day I can stand up in the rest of the world. It's not just about walking up to my front door. It's about making sure more Danny Pearls aren't assassinated and more Muslims aren't just taken from their homes without civil liberty protections.
What can we do to improve our image in other countries?
American foreign policy is undermining all the efforts of the U.S. to project itself as a sincere and honorable nation. I believe in this country, and that's why I am so proud to be an American. But the rest of the world knows about our history of coups and corruption and our economic foreign policy. They're not dummies. So when we try to bring reform to the Muslim world, many people believe we are part of a Bush administration conspiracy to change Islam. They see this as an effort to export a political agenda.
Do they have a right to be suspicious?
Yes. They know the story about how the Americans helped the shah in Iran and the CIA's role in the Afghan war and with the Taliban.
So what should Americans do?
Americans have a responsibility to make certain this country lives by the values by which it was founded: human rights and democracy and social justice. I covered Washington for years, and I know the influence of K Street on both domestic law and foreign policy. I'm not naive. But I feel that we should bring some humanity to foreign policy.
First, you wrote a sex book, Tantrika. Now you're a single mom, trying to change Islam. You could have chosen an easier path.
So much of the dysfunctionality in the Muslim world is because of our inability to deal with sexuality. So we segregate. We punish. And that manifests itself in these absurd ways -- like the concept that a woman's voice is forbidden in certain places because it's alluring. I'm able to take on the subject without being bashful. And it's great I had my son because now I don't have to pretend I'm a 39-year-old virgin. You know, we have sex in this world. It doesn't always work out the way we imagine or even expect, but this is the reality. Still, it's not easy. I know some people would rather that I cover my hair and be married and speak Arabic.
What is the best way to remember Danny Pearl?
When I met Danny, I had just ended a three-month marriage and was left in darkness. Danny played volleyball with me and helped me, as a 28-year-old, throw the first party I'd ever given. After he was kidnapped, I went through his e-mails, trying to find clues about the kidnappers. I didn't find any trash talk in there. That is uncommon for any one of us. We get so caught up in this human drama we forget we are put on earth to make this life better. I think we really need to work with passion for a better society. If we can do that, I believe we will live with the same spirit Danny left this earth with. And, you know, we can enjoy ourselves while we're making the world a better place. That's what he taught me.
Tara McKelvey is a Prospect senior editor.
