Breaking news from Dr. Pepper of the Daily Pepper
Washington, D.C., March 11 – Faced with the unprecedented growth of the budget deficit, the White House has announced that all in-house security operations have been transferred to a private corporation.
The corporation, Al Ameen Security Services International, has operated security in several Middle Eastern nations for thirty years. "We have established a very positive safety record in one of the world's most troubled regions," the company's chief executive officer, Mohammed Abdur-Rahim, told reporters at a press conference on Friday. "After making a highly competitive offer for the position, we were able to assure President Bush of continued success under the much safer conditions of the United States."
Beginning April 1st, Al Ameen International will assume full-time responsibility for the protection of the President. All current Secret Service employees have been given notice of their imminent termination.
